A bit of vanity

This blog is mostly about the kids, but it contains a few personal points of view too. I hesitated to post this for a long time. This is me biting the bullet.

Here's the deal. Almost a year ago, my parents and my husband bought me a (by request) gym pass for Christmas. I have gone to said gym about five days a week, sometimes more, ever since. At first, I just enjoyed the hour of "me time". Then, I started to see a little difference in my clothes. I decided it wouldn't hurt me to try not to eat an entire pan of cinnamon rolls on occasion. I saw a little more difference.

Before I started all this, I had a number of weight related issues.
1) I was uncomfortable. My clothes felt too tight.
2) I hated shopping for new clothes, because nothing looked right.
3) I was depressed. I felt ashamed that I had let myself go.
4) My energy was non-existent. At the end of the day, I could barely carry my children up the stairs.
5) I felt trapped in my house. I would get anxiety before social events because I felt like I didn't look my best.
6) As cheesy at is sounds, I felt like I was doing myself a disservice by ignoring my health and drowning those concerns with more food.
7) I rationalized that I needed to give all my time and energy to others, because I was selfish if I devoted some time to my health. I felt guilty about taking time.
8) I was horrified when I ran into people from my past because I had changed so much.
9) I knew I should be considering the example I was setting for my children. (baked goods do not equal love at home)

I was never huge.
At the most I weighed 165 pounds. I wore a size XL shirt and size 9/10 pants.
I do, however, have a small frame and really great metabolism. Keeping this in mind, the end result is not that surprising.
Whenever I had my picture taken, I was sure to stick
one of
my children
in front of my stomach.

I am happy to say that I don't do that anymore.
I even stand alone on occasion.
I work out. I am happier than I have ever been. I don't feel ashamed that I take this time. I am glad I take time for myself, and I would venture to say that my family sees the benefit of a happy, healthy mom.

There are those who are worried that I may be too skinny or losing too much. I assure you, this is not the case. I weigh 134 pounds. I wear a size S shirt ( albeit tight) and size 2 pants. I know this sounds tiny, mom, but I have always had skinny chicken legs and no rear.

I am lucky to have good genes.
I eat a lot of food.
The difference is that the food is mostly healthy.
I have never, in my entire life, been on a diet. I do not believe in diets.
I have never ever exercised regularly in conjunction with healthy eating until now.
So, it stands to reason that the first go at good habits would have drastic results, don't you think?

I am documenting this
so that I don't forget what if feels like to be healthy.

Several people have approached me and asked what my secret is. I am flattered.
There is no secret.
I try to eat healthy food and sleep enough and exercise everyday. I consider the calorie content before I eat it. I don't do this all the time, but more often than not, I do. Anyone can do it.
Your health is more important than you think.

Today, I look like this. Nothing special. Not perfect. Just healthier.
Stop worrying. I don't want to get any smaller.
I want to look like a woman, not an eight year old boy.
I'm not crazy.
I am however, still the proud mom of four awesome boys who happen to be learning that health should be a priority.